Breaks my heart.

Simple no more.

Simple things, just stuff that we do without thinking about it. Like putting whip cream on a desert, who would not know how to do that? Well, it would be my Sweetie. It is that which I've accustomed myself to over look. To do that which she can no longer do for herself. 

Meal are becoming a continues conversation on how she doesn't know how to do it. Last night she even said how stupid she is. That just breaks my heart. For she was at one time, the smartest woman I've ever known. She would think rings around me. There were times when I knew she was right, yet my pride and maleness wouldn't let me listen to her wisdom. Now, I draw on that which I can no longer hear, and use it to help her. 

Yesterday morning, we had sausage and eggs for breakfast. Went through our normal utterances of lost knowledge of what to do, and I'd tell her to put the food in her mouth. Otherwise she would just keep trying to put more food on her fork. Again it was two eggs for breakfast with link sausage, and again, she ate it all.  I had to cut the sausage into smaller bits for her otherwise she wouldn't eat the sausage. She has a habit of putting harder food on her fork first, then tries to put softer food on her fork after that and as you can imagine, it squashes the softer food, and she cannot get it on her fork. Like a piece of meat, than tries to add mash potatoes. It just pushes the mash potatoes around the plate. I can get frustrated just watching her try to eat. That is when I'll take her fork and fix the food for her. Soon, I'll be feeding her and I think both of us know that is coming soon. 

I'd like to talk about the use of CBD. I'm now starting the day with giving her some. She is more combative when she wakes up than she used to be. I've found that if I give her some as soon as I can, before breakfast, she starts the day better. 

She is now fighting brushing her teeth. Where as before, I was able to get her to brush, if even for a little bit, but now, she carries on, and once she has the brush in her hand, she won't give it up. I'm trying to figure a way for me to brush her teeth for her. 

Figure out. That is why my time with my Driver is so important. He will guide my thinking to the solution that works best for Sweetie and I'll feel good about it. When I'm with Him, He just pours His love into me, and I, in turn, lavish it on Sweetie. From the mountain top, to the lake below, I am that stream that feed the lake. The lake doesn't do anything, but from the mountain top, it is a thing of beauty to see. That is my love, a beautiful vista in my life. So, I guess we are off, into the mountains to see great and beautiful vistas, as we caravan together, on the Road to Dementia Town, keeping our Shiny Sides up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.