11/23/20

Sweetie, tree, and leaves.

I will never have this picture again. For you see, the elements of this picture are no more. Yes, Sweetie is still with me, yet again, she isn't who she was in this picture, the tree is gone, and thus the leaves will be no more. 

Had the tree taken down earlier this year, and yesterday, the stump was ground down, and a new tree was planted. It will be years before I have a yard full of leaves, for it will take years for it to grow big enough to do that. 

The Flowering Pear tree is so different from the willow we had. It has white flowers in the spring, and in the fall, the leaves turn different shades of red, gold, and rust. For me it will be a wonderful reminder of Sweetie and the years we had together. 

I was unprepared for what happened yesterday. It started somewhat normally. Sweetie laid in bed until I got her up. She stayed so long, that she leaked and had wet pants. Ominous beginning of the day. I gave her her first dose of CBD, and we had breakfast. Shortly after that, she went to the back bedroom, and laid down. She spent most of the day in bed. When she got up, she seem pleasant enough, but I gave her a second dose. It was shortly after that, I suggested that we go for a car ride, just to get out of the house, and that is when Mr. Sundowner showed up. 

It was you go for a ride, I'm staying here. And so it began. For the next hour, it was uncomprehendable conversation, pushing, and angry demands. 

I was able to get some more CBD into her, and because it was cold, got a jacket on her, and went walking outside. What is amazing, and I've heard it from others, is that she is so friendly to strangers, and then she will turn on me in an instant. As she walked, the CBD started to work and Mr. Sundowner was loosing steam. 

Once back it the house, I got her to rub some Stress Relief lotion on her hands, soon, she was back to being sweet herself. Maybe she just sleeping well enough these days. Her ear is getting red, and I've found dried blood from it on the pillow. I've started a regimentation of Tea Tree Oil on her ear, in the morning, and attempting to put it on when she goes to bed. She must sleep super hard on that side, for this is a new issue with her. Also using some cortisone lotion on it. Got to get her somewhat regulated, for Thursday is Thanksgiving, and I don't want her to miss it. It could be our last one. 

Driver says that everyday is a day of Thanksgiving, for Sweetie is still with me. So true. Each day is special, how alone I will be, when that day comes and she is no more. What a oxymoron, can't wait for her suffering to be over, and yet, at the same time being left alone is so frightening. For today, I have her, and today will be the best today we can make it. The is the best I can do, as I go with my Driver as we travel down the Road to Dementia Town, Keeping our Shiny Side up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.