The question asked: "How do you do it?"

The answer, she is my Love.

After yesterday's post, a follower asked the question, "How do you do it?" As I pondered the answer, I found myself asking me that same question, "How do I do it?" 

The answer is simple, and for the one thing I know, simple does not mean easy. 

Like Dementia, the answer doesn't suddenly make itself know, it comes on slowly. If you're just stepping into the role of a caregiver and the person you're caring for has been on the Road to Dementia Town for a while, it can be and is often a struggle that can be overwhelming, and downright frustrating.

I think my Driver set me up to take care of her long before I knew I was being set up. The first thing that happened, was my facing my battle with the bottle. Years before we had her diagnosed, my drinking was way out of control and that had to be addressed first. (Mind you, that I'm looking back on what happened with a more understanding of what needed to be done and the order in which it happened.) 

After a real ruff time, I ended up in A.A. which put me on the road to recover. I had a couple of years of sobriety when Sweetie's memory difficulties were so apparent, I knew something was wrong. 

This is when we had her tested. That was something in its self. It took 3 attempts before she saw a neurologist. Then another month before we met with a Neurophysiologist. and received the diagnosis of her Dementia.

After that, Driver put people and tools in my path. People that were and are going through what we are going through. 

Frist, it was a man whose wife was a patient there, told me about his support group. I shrugged it off until I ran into the man again, at the DMV of all places. It was as if someone was tapping me on my shoulder, telling me to pay attention. 

At my first meeting, it scared the shit out of me. What these men told me, about where we were, where we are, and what to is waiting for us, helped me prepare myself for that which I knew nothing about. 

Then there was the remembering of my vow to her when we were married:

To love, honor and care

for each other.

In sickness and in health...

Tell death do us part.

It became very clear, that it was up to me to live up to those vows I made to her so many years ago. Did I mean it, or was it just words? 

Over the years, I have changed. It was almost two years ago; I started this blog. If you would have asked me how back then, I think the answer might have been somewhat different, but the same. 

Knowing that I'm not on this path alone and the fact that you and others are with me. Those in my support group are with me, and most importantly, I have a Driver that is in control of what happens as we drive this Road to Dementia Town. Because of Him, we are able to Keep Our Shiny Side Up. Thank you for the question, hope my answer is sufficient for you.  C'ya, Luv Ya and God Bless.   Arthur.