The Dragon Dementia.

Us'un.

Here we are, just the two of us. We are at the zoo, in the Penguin exhibit. It had been closed because of the CV19 pandemic, and this was the first time back in. Going to the zoo is just another place to go. Sweetie doesn't seem to understand what we are doing there. 

As the days continue to shorten, and evening times are stretched, we are doing our best to get the day done. That seems to be the aim of living now. To be able to make it from wake up to sleep. Because Sweetie doesn't know what we are doing and she just trust me to keep her safe and that's is my mission in life today. I just have to make sure she is safe, and healthy, and well fed. 

Fixing food for her is sometimes a challenge. Take yesterday, breakfast is beginning to be a hassle. I not only give her her cereal with Ensure on it, I also am now giving her a glass of Ensure to go along with it. 

Cereal is now a hunt to find what she will eat, and just because she eats it one morning doesn't me she will again. There just isn't any certainty with her. Dementia is sneaky as a fox. She won't tell me she doesn't like what she is eating, it is just her phrasing of "I don't know how to do it" and just what it means now. If she isn't hungry, it will start almost the moment I put food in front of her, and the more she says it, the more the meaning is, I don't like it. 

Dementia has it own language and the meanings are dynamic. It is up to me to decipher just what she is trying to tell me. She will interchange words that either mean what she wants, or they will mean the opposite of what she is saying. Of course, I have to add her body language into the interpretation, which can help, and I also have to take into account where we are and what we are doing. 

Most of the time, I can understand what she is trying to tell me, and then again, I'm guessing. If we are out, and she is acting afraid, just telling her that I'll take care of her, and she is safe with me, seems to be the answer. Her security is my default response. 

It is the same when I'm with my Driver. While we are in the car, I can relax. No where else is there such a relaxing place then in the passenger seat while He is doing all the driving. These are my times when I can drop all my shields and be naked before Him. Then, He will take my armor, clean it, polish it, and help me put it back on, for another day is coming, and I must battle the dragon Dementia again. For the dragon becomes stronger each day, and I must prepare for the battle and He is there not only to make sure I'm prepared, but to give me help with my battle plan, to know the places to use my sword of love, piercing it just right, to add love and caring, knowing that I cannot slay such a dragon. That is why we are together, driving down the Road to Dementia Town, Leading the caravan, all with our Shiny Sides Up. C'ya, Luv Ya, and God Bless.    

 

Mr. Sundowners

At the zoo

This is the most recent picture of my Sweetie. I've been searching where the pictures went, when I down load them from my phone. As you can see, I found them. If I didn't, I still have the other pictures. I'm thinking of backing them up on a memory stick, just for safe keeping. I have a friend that damaged his hard drive, and lost all the pictures that were stored on it. Unlike this blog, which is off my machine, all my memories are loaded here. 

Switching from daylight savings to standard time, and for whatever the reason, it is hard on Sweetie. When I went up to get her, she was already up and dressed. Bad for me, because I still need to change her pullups. It was a small battle and of course I won, but it set the tone for the morning. Mr. Sundowners was waking up. 

Even though I started her off with a dose of Hemp Oil, she wasn't responding as usual. 

I found our waffle maker and thought we'd have waffles for breakfast. It was not a good idea. She was into her "I don't know how to do it." mode. I cut up her waffle, and she did eat. They weren't that good, gonna have to thin out the batter next time, but she ate them anyway. 

The strange behavior was after breakfast, we sat and watched our Sunday church show. When it was over, I tried to get Sweetie to come with me to get ready for the day. She didn't want to go with me. Ut-ho, something new is afoot and just where was it leading to I would soon find out . After several attempts, I left her, set the alarm for the front door, and got myself ready for the day. 

She was still on the couch when I got back. I had found some old pictures and had been showing them to her. It was when I sat down to try again, she got up, and Mr. Sundowners was in complete control. She was like a super ball, bouncing all over the place. It was as if she didn't understand anything I said to her, and when I tried to answer her questions, she didn't even think I talked to her. 

I was able to talk her into taking her "balance medicine" and got some Stress Relief lotion on her. It wasn't until we went for a walk that she was able to come back to me. As the Hemp Oil did its magic, Sweetie slowly became herself and I was able to relax some. We spent most of the day out of the house. Went to the mall for a walk around, and a long drive home. 

Again, at evening time, she started up again and went to bed downstairs. I had a meeting on zoom, so it was good she was on the same floor I was, and after the zoom meeting, I retrieved her and took her upstairs. 

All is well, and my Driver knows it. I think He knows that it will take a couple of days for Sweetie to adjust to standard time, and so He is preparing me with extra Grace for the times ahead. He has the day already planned, and knows where the Grace fill ups are. I'm sure I'll need them, as Driver and me head down the Road to Dementia Town, followed by all those cars, all with Their Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.   

 

Thanksgiving, to give thanks.

Us

Halloween has come and gone and it was as if there wasn't any celebration at all. We went to bed at our normal time, and it was dark enough to have some Trick or Treater's at our door, but the streets were empty of any life. It was just as well because we didn't have any candy for them. I don't see any good coming from Sweetie getting all excited that late in the day. Covid19 has reshaped our attitudes toward the holidays. 

Thanksgiving is next and I'm wondering what will happen with family gatherings. As of today, I'm just planning on getting a small turkey breast and a packet of gravy and do our own little Thanksgiving. 

Thanksgiving, to give thanks for the many blessings that we have had over the past year. Believe me when I say they are many. Even with the advancement of Sweetie's Dementia, there were many blessings. 

Let me begin with the biggest blessing, CBD Hemp Oil. I've read many stories on Facebook, of those who are dealing with the dreaded Mr. Sundowner, and are just frustrated, frazzled, and worn out. I can say the same. When I read of successful stories about the uses of Hemp Oil, I said what the hell, lets give it a try. There was a early trial and error period, but now we have it down pat. It has made a world of difference for us. We can now do things and enjoy life again. She is declining, and at the same time, we're managing the decline. 

Another blessing is me. For I am not the man that I was when I started down this Road to Dementia Town with Sweetie. My Driver isn't just the one guiding us down this road, He is also my teacher, by confidant, and holder of my hand. He has shown me how to love. Not just the type of love and get rewarded for it, He has taught me how to love unconditionally. Each morning I pray for the "Wisdom, Grace, and Mercy" as I care of Sweetie. Each day my quotient of those attitudes are renewed, refreshed and refilled. As long as I can spend time with Driver as we travel down this daily trip to Dementia Town, I'm sure I won't run out of the love we three of us share. As we head up the caravan, headed down the Road to Dementia Town, in a line of cars, all with Their Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv Ya, and God Bless.