Feel cheated.

Me a Sweetie, I love you, Sweetie. 

What can I say about yesterday? It was a good day for us? Ya, sure, but does that cover the day? To be frank, no it doesn't. 

Because of the blistery day before, I'd decided to let Sweetie sleep, and try to figure out what to do all day. Sleep in wasn't in her plans, for she got up around the time I would normally get her up. Because we had time on our hands, and she was messy from the night before, it was shower time. Washing her hair and body, drying her off, and putting on clean clothes become special events. Sweetie doesn't know it, but doing this, is such a reminder of what we were like and the intimacies we shared in years gone by. 

There are times when I feel cheated. When we could talk, kiss and touch as lovers do, and now that is all but taken away. I do get my hugs in, a few lite kisses, but that is all, just surface emotions, nothing more, nothing less. 

Last night, I pulled out the red plates and sat at the table for dinner. Because she isn't eating as much as I'd like, I thought I'd give the red plates a try. She did OK, ate just about all there was on her plate. I'm giving her more then what I've been giving her, trying to fatten her up. I've been to enough meetings, seminars, and what I read on my own, to know that less intake is the norm, and weight loss is a battle that cannot be won, just slowed down a bit. 

Today is my "Freedom" day. A sitter is coming in to watch Sweetie as I was going to my support group. I woke to an email that has cancelled the meeting, and rescheduled for next week. Because of the hoops to jump through, I cannot cancel this morning, so I'm off to the golf course for that time. Got to take advantage of the me time.   

That is what I have when I get into the car with my Driver. Me time, even though it is really His time. I feel like I'm the center of His attention, knowing just what I need before I know what I need. So it isn't me time, it is our time and I get as much as I need. He is always showing me the good things, the loving things, that where there is sadness, joy is waiting around the corner. He tells me that you can't have one without the other. Ying and Yang does have some merit here. He explains it all, as we travel down the Road to Dementia Town, Shiny Side Up, with a side of laughter along the way. Coming? It is easy, just follow us, as we travel the Road to Dementia Town, Keep your Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Love Ya, and God Bless.