The long road ahead.

Disneyland

Wow, I look at these pictures and it seems like such a long time ago. If you think that 5 years is along time ago, it is. Yet at the same time, I look and think that was just a blink of the eye.

We were both fat and happy. I knew what was waiting for us, or should I say, I had a good idea of what was in our future. I'd been going to my men's support group. Had heard the stories, and was preparing myself for the long road ahead. 

As of today, I'm still doing what I need to do, one day at a time. I'm learning the grace to attempt to get Sweetie to do something, and if she won't, take it in stride. Take the simple task of brushing her teeth. Normally, I've been able to get her to use her brush, maybe not as long as I'd like her to brush, some is better than none and that is my thinking. For the past couple of days, she is just refusing to even try. 

Then there are the times when she will refuse to do anything, and I can still talk her into doing it. Like taking her balance medicine. We go through this unwritten script of why, who, what for, and at the same time either pulling away or brushing the dropper away as I attempt to put it in her mouth. Normally, I can penetrate the wall that Dementia puts up and get the task done. 

For lunch, I prepared fried hot dog sandwiches. Not only was the continued "can't do this." happening, something else. She squeezes the bread so hard, that it squeezes everything out that is between the bread. I don't think she understands that the sandwich isn't going to run away or fall out of her hands. Again, how do I want to her to eat, or do I want her to do it "right"? Anyway, it is just her and I at the table, so what difference does it make? Just get the food inside of her is the quest, not how it is done. 

How is it done? That is what my Driver has to ask me. He wants me to do it with love and honor. To find ways that show love to Sweetie. He is there, filling me up with His love, so I can transfer it to her. Sweetie still tells me she loves me, and that I believe is because of the love that I've poured into her. And the love that I pour into her is from my Driver filling stations. We make regular stops along the way. Even stop every now and then, just to top off the tank just to make sure we have enough love in the tank for what is coming around the bend. It is like that when we are on the Road to Dementia Town, just can't run low on fuel, as we drive with Our Shiny Sides Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God bless.