My heart just melts.

The Look that melts my heart.

The funny things about living in a blessed moment of time, that many times the blessing isn't seen, felt, or realized until after the time has past. Like this one, the capture of the way Sweetie is looking at me. When I turn and see her face, her eyes, her love watching me, my heart just melts.

I was talking to someone about Sweetie, and I used the term "I serve her." I'd never thought of that. I know I do just about everything for her and to her, but never thought that I was serving her, just taking care of her. 

To me, a servant is an underling, a non seeable entity, that takes care of those they serve. With Sweetie, I serve her love. For it is that which stays, even after the body is gone. Love with humility makes the best servant, for there isn't expectation of something in return. When there is a acknowledgement, it just lifts me up. For me it is her eyes, her smile, and the words: "I love you."

Friday 

I was hoping for a good day, it was suppose to be breezy, but it wasn't. 

When I got Sweetie up, she had wet her self, the bed, and drop cloths. In other words, a shower was needed. 

As I washed her, I could tell that she was going to, at last, have a bowel movement today. Sounds icky to say that, but I'd never thought praying for a BM and finding that the answer to that prayer would happen this day.

After breakfast, got ready, and out the door we went. Off to the golf course. 

Sweetie has been acting weak lately, and the ride in the golf cart seems to help. This time, she was nodding off in the cart. This is something new for her. I accept it as just another step down into the darkness of Dementia. 

When I was at the car, getting ready to get her out of the cart and into the car, I was very fortunate that two me saw Sweetie and asked if they could help. It couldn't of been at a most opportune time. As I was helping her out of the cart, she collapsed, and they jumped in and got her into the car. In the car and home. I put her in bed, and waited. Knowing that her batteries were down to zero charge.    

I let her sleep for about 90 minutes, woke and off to the grocery store. I rushed through our shopping, keeping a wary eye on her, thinking that she could go down at any minute. She didn't and we made it through that adventure. 

When I made dinner, I was hoping she would be hungry and eat. She was not and did not eat that much. I got her to eat the meat and some of the vegetables. I know about this stage of not eating and there isn't anything anyone can do. 

I had been giving her ensure occasionally, and I think this is the time I should start giving it to her daily. And so the story continues. 

It seems that we have hit a rough part of the Road to Dementia Town. Driver and me know what is happening, and I hold her tightly to me. As He always says, "Don't worry, I'll take good care of her, until then, you're doing a great job." He is my comforter, my strength, and shoulder to cry on, when needed. As we move down the road, Keeping our Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.