An Albatross around my neck.

USS Arizona, Pearl Harbor, Oahu. Hawaii 

Pictures of our last great vacation. The most planned, the most anticipated, the one that was going to be the best of the best. It was and then again, it wasn't. I have the pictures, the memories, what I don't have is the person to share them with, the person that was the reason for going there isn't there anymore. 

Last night, we went to a meeting and I was greeted by an old friend with a message for me. She told me that she could see the love and care by the way I was caring for Sweetie. That she knows of others that care for  their spouse begrudgingly. She want me to know how much it shows. 

I must be doing something right, because she isn't the only one that tells me that. I'm grateful for those encouraging words. 

I believe that it is my choice on how I treat Sweetie, that I choose how we are going to be. I've said this before, and will again. I choose to enjoy each and everyday with her. While doing what I want, with limitation, and to include her in all that we do. 

She isn't an Albatross around my neck. If I thought that it would only lead to resentments, anger and hate. Instead, I have to look at her as who she is, my wife. The one that put up with me everyday of our married life. She cared for me and loved me even when I was unlovable. 

She still can tell me she loves me, gives me kisses, hugs me, and smiles at and for me. In her ways, she is still that woman who still loves me. How can I not love her. 

Monday

It started like it has been starting as of late, earlier then I'd like. Watching her move about on the bed, and just waiting for her to get up. That is when I get myself going to get her. Because of the Nanny Cams, I can wait until the right time. 

She has been eating more and for that, I'm grateful. At the same time, wondering how long this behavior will last? So far, so good. 

Had a normal day of meals, golf, and our walking about. 

What was new was one of my evening meetings had return to a pre-pandemic agenda. Meeting face to face, in person and with enthusiasm. I was wiry of how Sweetie would take the meeting. She loved it. She smiled and gave hugs, she talked her talk, even though no one knew what she was saying, it was the joy to see her make that attempt. ("smile and nod, boys, smile and nod.") The group was as happy to see her as she was to see them. 

After the meeting, it was home and to bed. 

Driver made the right turn at the fork on the Road to Dementia Town. We went along the smooth road, down in the gentle hills and dales. A day of refreshing breezes and colorful flowers. So, it was easy going as we went, Keeping our Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.