Together again.

Tweety and me on Route 66

I know it has been a couple of weeks since my last post. Things are moving along at what I feel is a good pace. 

Lets start off with my missing my Sweetie Pie. It sometimes is worse than those first days. I believe that is the way I process things. Using the imagery of a BBQ. Putting the charcoal in the pit, adding the lighter fluid, and then the match. 

The coals explode in a fireball, and in a short time, the fire goes out. What is left is a pile of bricks with a ting of gray on their edges. If you stay and watch, or walk away, the gray areas grow, and in time, you have a hot bed of coals ready to cook on. 

After Sweetie passed, my tears, my broken heart, the waves of loss pour in and out and on me. No matter how much I had prepared for that time, it wasn't enough. For those of you who have been through this stage know exactly what I'm talking about. Those who are still in the waiting room, you will find out soon enough. When the waiting is over, there are not enough words of comfort that will comfort the hurt that suddenly arrives at your hearts front door.

For me, my mourning is about where the BBQ is. A bed of red hot, ready to cook, and waiting. Here is where I put my memories, my pain, the regrets, the resentments, the amends to her, all go on the grill and with careful turning, take them from a cold plate to a meal of delights that refresh the soul and give strength for another day. 

Now that I have my Sweetie Teddy Bear, when I travel I take her with me, sitting on my hip, while we car seat dance to the music. 

Driver, Sweetie and me on the Road to New Life, together again. C'ya, Luv Ya, and God Bless. Arthur.