The solution was so simple.

She's full of life.

What she was, she made me complete. It is that old saying, "You don't know what you have until it's gone." Well, that is me. Though Sweetie isn't completely gone, what I have now is just a slim reminder of what we had. 

I sometimes lately wonder, if you ever notice the dandelion in the upper right corner of the page? With it's flower being blown away? I chose that for this one simple reason. Can you figure it out? 

The day was full of surprises. She slept most of the morning and when I got her up, I had made up my mind that this morning was going to be a shower morning. Was able to herd her into the shower, got her hair washed, and washed me too. 

It was after the shower, that was the interesting part. I talked myself into giving her another hair cut. It is short, not as short as I'd like it to be, but short. It will look better in a couple of weeks, so I'm pleased with it. I want it short, for the simplest of reason, care. After all of that, getting her dressed and therapy on her shoulder, she went back to bed. 

I did something that I'm amazed that I did. She wears skinny jeans. That's OK, what the hard part is the leggings. She has one hell of a time getting her feet through the end of the pant leg. Both on and off. I've been pondering getting someone, ie daughter, to cut a slit up the leg, to widen the end of the pant leg, for easier on and off. You know, I just hate it when the light comes on. I can do that! So, I did. Amazing difference. I've been looking for replacement pants, for the skinny jeans, because of the difficulties of getting them on and off, and the solution was so simple. Yea, Easter Egg. 

Driver knows how much sleep Sweetie needs, and His driving allows her that needed rest. He sat with me, while she recovered from the shower, and hair cut. He tells me that her batteries need recharging more now then ever. They just don't hold a charge like they used to. Resting on the side of the Road to Dementia Town is good. We don't have a time schedule to keep, we just have to Keep our Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.     

I remind her.

Sweetie, Tweetie, and Balloon Fiesta.

Feeling low this morning. Don't know why. It was like always, good time, not so much good times, and then... the end of the day is near. That just about tells it all. 

Had a person come over to measure for new blinds. The one in the living room, the gearing to change the angle of the blinds went out years ago, and I want to replace it. And there are two windows that need replacements. 

I was surprised by the sales lady. She recommended repairing the one, and we ordered the others. That is what we agreed to, and we are going to see it happen. Waiting on a email with the price and then to get things done. 

Well, tried to find Sweetie some pants that fit her. She is just hard to size. Found some that had the length, but the waist was too tight, going to return them today. 

We're back on CBD, and lotion. They are working well, and that is a blessing. Her arm is also improving. She tried her hardest to use it to eat with, almost got it to her mouth. I think in a day or two, with the lotions and vibrator, she will be back to being right handed again. 

Last night, we were eating dinner, and she just got up, went to the back bedroom, and crawled into bed. She has done this before, what makes this different, is that she would come out after 30 or so minutes, sit with me, and then go we'd go to bed. Not this time. I think she is getting herself mentally moved to the back bedroom. It could be the stairs are getting to be too much for her. Just another progression of her dementia. Looks like I'm going to move some of the things we do every morning down to the bathroom, some of her cloths, and the rest. Not sure if I'll join her, she seems to want to sleep by herself more and more. 

I remind her every morning, or upon awaking, who I am, and what I do for her. Some mornings there is a light of remembrance in her eyes, and then again, she doesn't know who I am. Those are the most difficult mornings. As the day and the Hemp Oil go, she starts to have some vague idea that she is safe with me. That is the most important concept for me to get her to understand. Then, doing that which I must do, takes on an easier way of getting it done. 

Going to try and get her hair shampooed this morning. I know it is bad when her fingernails are dirty from scratching her scalp. I'm even going to try and cut her hair. Doing all that to make care easier for me. 

Well, it is time to get into the car with my Driver at the wheel. He knows what must be done and can plan today's ride accordingly. Some mornings it is a struggle to get in, yet, with a big smile, a "Good Morning Champ." He brightens the way. As we travel down the Road to Dementia Town, and as always, Keeping our Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.  

Easy.

@the zoo.

We made it to the zoo. This is an old picture, but it was at the zoo, so I will use it anyway. I look at these pictures, and to see the love of my life, still full of life, to know that that isn't her today. I digress. 

If I dwell in the past too much, I can get depressed. I think it is only nature for me to want to give into the pull of depression. It would be so easy to fall and not get back up. At the same time it isn't easy. 

Easy would be easy. Life isn't. There are times when it seems that life is easy, and that is usually when I come out of a difficult time. Surviving seems difficult, until that time of surviving is over, then it was easy. 

Each day with Sweetie is a good mixture of both, and usually ending with easy. Take yesterday. Some difficulty getting her up. I was worried about her being constipated, I don't have that worry now. One less thing to worry about. Her shoulder is getting better, and I'm not giving her as much Hemp Oil as I've done in the past. Just letting her act normally, if there is such a thing as "normal" with dementia. 

I want to see just how well I do with her being off CBD. If I can guide her or shepherd her, and make it through the day. 

After I got her up, fed, and ready, we headed to the zoo. She was fine walking with me, and there wasn't much to see. We stopped at the Polar Bear's , and they were being bears, sunning themselves, not very active. It was shortly after that she said she was cold. As we headed out, we stopped at the duck pond, and did our sharing thing with the kiddies. Sweetie wouldn't feed any of the animals, just watched. 

After the zoo, we went and did a mall crawl, and some shopping. Tried to find some sweatpants for her, they didn't have her size. So, we got our stuff, and headed home. 

That is where it got not so easy. I was putting the food away, when I noticed Sweetie wasn't with me, and the front door was unlocked. She was walking down the street, and I quickly joined her. She didn't know where she was going, but she was going. I walked with her and she didn't mind me being there. 

We live in a loop, imagine a track around a football field, and that is what our neighborhood is like. Sweetie started walking, and she walked the loop three time before I decided to guide her back into the house. If I didn't she might still be walking. Once inside, the frustration of being stopped broke out. When I tried to get her to take some CBD, she fought me and I had to give up. That is when I went for the Lotion. It took some time, but it worked. It was Mr. Sundowner at his best. Just to wrap this up. Lotion, a nap, and then some Hemp, and we had a very nice, easy, evening. 

See, its easy. That is what my Drive keeps reminding me. You have to have the rough to enjoy the smooth easy. The Road to Dementia Town is like that. Rough then easy, as we go, Keeping our Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.