Dementia, making a smaller world for us.

This is the Lady of my Heart.

There are mornings that seem like, I'm stuck, what should I say, how to begin. One of the things I've learned is to just start. I've been looking at the picture I've attached to this days entry. It was are first and only time to California Country next to Disneyland. Sweetie was still able to carry on a simple conversation at that time, and we enjoyed ourselves. Sweetie was never much a rider of thrilling rides, ie rollercoasters, so much of our time was walking and looking. We would take the gentler slower rides and that was enough for her. I didn't know that I was capturing memories back then. Or finding Easter Eggs for the future. 

Our world has grown small since that day in California. The fact that she is now so dependent on me is a place that seemed to arrive slowly, yet suddenly. For as Dementia progresses, and takes away something, I just by the nature of caregiving, replace it with something of mine. Our meals have changed from food on plates, to bowels, from forks and knives, to spoons. I know there will be the coming of me feeding her. 

We played golf yesterday, and even with me getting her to drink water and Gatorade, she still had a fainting episode. I'm going to try a cart today, I hope it works. Daycare is still shut down for another month, they say two weeks. We're in a blue state, and the governors of blue states are doing everything they can not to open. I'm betting June at the earliest, if that.

To top the day off, sundowners had a sneak attack last night. I really think that I can only hold off sundowners for a short while. Then it builds up and boils over. As long as I can keep Sweetie in the house or backyard so she cannot get out and terrorize the neighborhood, we're doing fine. I can take the yelling, and tears inside, but to let her walk, that is a different story. 

What my Driver has taught me, is this, don't let one event in the day ruin my Easter Egg hunt. If I let the horrors of sundowners denominate my reflection on the day, I'll never find the Easter Eggs that were there for me during the day. 

Driver is right, and He knows that, and here He is now. Looks like I'm going to have a treat today. He's got a bottle of water and a small cake for me to refresh myself with as we go down the Road to Dementia Town. Driver and me, two cool cats, Him with His huge smile, and me with my cool sunglasses on, down the road we go, Keeping our Shiny Side Up. Don't let one event, like a flat tire, ruin your drive, as you travel the Road to Dementia Town, Keeping your Shiny Side Up. Well, TTFN, Love Ya and God Bless.