Sweetie's Handsome Brut.

Sweetie and her hansome Brut.

That is how I picture us. Her term of endearment Handsome Brut is one that I've kept near and dear to my heart. I have fond memories of us dancing together. In the night clubs, at parties, and in the kitchen at home. We don't dance much these days, it is just one of those precious memories that have become priceless. They shine like the stars on those clear nights. When they seem so close that you could just reach out and gather them together and hold them close to your heart. 

This is memory training for me. Learning that life is not just living, it is keeping the memories alive. I think of the movie "Coco." How the final death takes the soul and it disappears when there isn't anyone left who remembers you. I've spent many years creating memories with Sweetie and some are beautiful flowers, and then there are the weeds. They want to grow and choke out the flowers, I won't let them. For I want to have full and beautiful bouquets of memories after she has gone. 

Monday

It was another hard start for Sweetie. She had been awake for awhile before I went to get her. It was a half smile morning. I think she was happy to see me, and not so happy to have to move. 

Lately, she has been eating less. She still goes after her toast in the morning, and the sandwich for lunch, and less so for dinner. I don't want to give her less food, because of her eating less, then again, I don't want to waste food. Stuck between a rock and a hard place. It seems the less I give her, the less she eats. 

Daycare is texting me in preparation of re-opening and wants me to get all the paper work done. Because of the pandemic and being with Sweetie 24/7, I believe it wouldn't do us any good to have her in daycare. She is so used to me being with her that if I put her back into daycare, it would screw things up. 

When she was there last time, they wanted me to put her into another facility that could "give her the care she needed." So, I'm going to find another caregiver to give me a couple of weekdays off, and just keep Sweetie with her Handsome Bute. 

These are the decisions that me and Drive come together on. Not that He doesn't know what is best, it is me. I have to listen and come to agreement with His plan, not the other way around. Decisions on the way, as we travel down the Road to Dementia Town. Keeping a sane mind, solving problems and our Shiny Side Up. C'ya, Luv ya, and God Bless.